Here is a list of members of our loyal police, charged with protecting Cambridge from murderers of innocents and people that annoy the all powerful Umpire:
Rank | Pseudonym | Real Name | Email Address | Address | College | Water Weapons Status | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
The Inevitable | Stitches the S.T.A.B. AKA The Cloak | ??? | stitchesthestab@gmail.com | The Next Reality | Girton | Full Water | Welcome. |
Mayor | Mayor Quimby | Michael Warman | michael.warman2@googlemail.com | Springfield Town Hall | Peterhouse | Full Water | Vote Quimby |
Fan Favourite | Cop Rick | Mahika Dixit | mkd31@cam.ac.uk | North Court A2 | St John's | No Water | OoB when carrying violin, I have a room-mate |
Fan Favourite | Chief Wiggum | Thomas Carey | twc37@cam.ac.uk | O4, Friars' Building | Queens' | No Water | |
Off-Screen Killer | Paranoid Hyperboloid | Leo Zlotnikov | lz375@cam.ac.uk | West House 251 | Homerton | No Water | OoB on a bike and while typesetting |
Gaaa Gn Gnann Ganaa Gaa Gaaa Gaaaa! | Stabbity Rabbity | Valentin Foley | sef44@cam.ac.uk | 8 Trumpington Street Room 3 | Corpus Christi | Water With Care | My building has CCTV, so do try not to look too shifty. The cabinet just inside my room has glassware on it, so please bear that in mind if you're planning to charge through the door guns blazing. |
Background Character | Big Shaq | Alexander Hardwick | alexander.hardwick@gmail.com | The Main House, Holywell Ford, Magdalen College Oxford | The Real World (no college) | Full Water | Master Assassin, now resident in Oxford, very friendly, likes chocolate. |
Background Character | Mr Plod | Edwin Balani | eb677@srcf.net | OoB | Magdalene | No Water | Consult me if offering Scooby Snacks (cookies), for I have requirements. |
Background Character | Lucia Konohana | Haruka Asahi | luciasunbright@gmail.com | Somewhere on campus, find me and I might give you a cookie~ | Kazamatsuri Academy | No Water | Out of Bounds when on a bike. Please no skin contact weapons, we'd both regret it! |
Background Character | Officer Jenny | Alex Allen | alexandra.allen@cantab.net | 10 Marmora Road | The Real World (no college) | Full Water | Master Assassin, Master Lemming . . . Vote Quimby |
Background Character | Professor Calculus | Catherine Wooller | csw51@cam.ac.uk | D19 | Girton | Water With Care | |
Background Character | Lork | Romaric Masson | romaric_m@yahoo.fr | 70 Gough way, Cambridge CB3 9LN (use short cut pathway from Grange road) | Anglia Ruskin | Water With Care | I have house mates, so do make sure you have the right person! |
Not Safe for TV | Scooby and the Gang | David Horstmann | djh243@cam.ac.uk | Block B, Room 15 | Fitzwilliam | No Water | |
Not Safe for TV | Kenneth | James Rhodes | jar95@cam.ac.uk | B2 | Fitzwilliam | No Water | Out of bounds on bike |
Not Safe for TV | The Names of Recent Players | Roddy MacSween | rlm72@cam.ac.uk | 223 West House | Homerton | No Water | |
Not Safe for TV | Gentleman's Vengeance | Alexander (Alex) Hibbert | ajh269@cam.ac.uk | Mallory Court, Staircase F, Room 5 | Magdalene | No Water | There is often another person in my room. For the avoidance of doubt, I am not female. |
Not Safe for TV | Ian Competent | Matthew (Matt) Hutton | mfh45@cam.ac.uk | New South Court, M4.9 | Emmanuel | No Water | |
Not Safe for TV | Mr Meeseeks | Sam Sully | sjs252@cam.ac.uk | Room F3 | Robinson | No Water | OoB when cycling. |
Not Safe for TV | Eric Cartman | Michael Djali | mkdjali@gmail.com | J06, Main Court | Downing | No Water | OoB on a bike |
Not Safe for TV | Victor Volt | Paul Durbaba | pd452@cam.ac.uk | Room D17, 3rd Floor, D Staircase, Robinson College | Robinson | No Water | OoB on a bike |
Not Safe for TV | Me-Mow | Rebecca Harris | reh95@cam.ac.uk | Chapel Court 5, Room 3 | Jesus | Water With Care | Out of Bounds on a bike |
Not Safe for TV | The reanimated corpse of Private Snafu, now armed with Dip and unfettered by concerns for personal safety AKA A Long Pseudonym | Avigail Ben-Gad | ab2300@cam.ac.uk | Old Lodge 3 | Magdalene | No Water | Out of bounds 12am-8am |
Not Safe for TV | Zu | Zsuzsanna Baran (Zsuzsa) | zb251@cam.ac.uk | B17 Angel Court | Trinity | No Water | |
Not Safe for TV | Hatman | Alex Craggs | ajc328@cam.ac.uk | L10, Cripps Court | Selwyn | No Water | |
Not Safe for TV | TheFifthKnock | Colin Kaljee | cjkaljee@gmail.com | Old South Court M10 | Emmanuel | Water With Care | He will knock four times. |
Not Safe for TV | Night Angel | Povilas Slekys | povilas.slekys@gmail.com | Ash Court 2.14 | Girton | Water With Care | |
Not Safe for TV | Undefined Behaviour | Joe Malt | jsm84@cam.ac.uk | Room 6A, North Court, Churchill College | Churchill | No Water | OoB when cycling anywhere I could be hit by a car. [Umpire's Note: This is general bike rules for everyone] |
Not Safe for TV | Wabbit | Nicholas Heitler | nh449@cam.ac.uk | Old Lodge 5 | Magdalene | Water With Care |
Killed in the line of duty:
Rank | Pseudonym | Real Name | College |
---|---|---|---|
Evil Mastermind | Professor Incompetent | Alastair Haig | Girton |
Especially Not Safe for TV | Paranoid Hyperboloid | Leo Zlotnikov | Homerton |
And these are the names of those who turned to the dark side, and paid the price:
| Home || Email |
| News 00 || News 01 || News 02 || News 03 || News 04 || News 05 || News 06 || Updates || Headlines || police || wanted || inco || stats |