The Assassins' Guild

[24 Nov, 20:59 PM] The Grape of Wrath & The Man With Absolute Machismo double kill at the last minute.

[24 Nov, 18:22 PM] Robin Hood and Zaphod killed each other in a deadly fight

[24 Nov, 15:06 PM] Hug Me! owes Dr Faust a Sainsburys Doughnut

[24 Nov, 16:34 PM] The Viator killed Maid Marion

[24 Nov, 14:00 PM] Hug Me! stabbed Jack so far away from home. PLEASE CHANGE TO 14:00 SAT

[21 Nov, 10:20 AM] An Assassin dined with Beard Bird before breaking a no kill to slaughter this gallant gentleman 10:20 PM not AM

[19 Nov, 13:24 PM] Delete this event

[19 Nov, 09:45 AM] Beard Bird slaughtered Mencellator as he walked carelessly around Trinity

New on Sunday, 25 November

[24 Nov, 13:20 PM] Zaphod was late for an appointment with Death, so Maid Marion chivied him along.

New on Saturday, 24 November

[20 Nov, 14:30 PM] Nature's Harmonic Simultaneous 4-Day Time Cube lured Zaphod out of his room and shot him in a deadly duel

[24 Nov, 15:50 PM] The Man With Absolute Machismo killed The Man with Absolute Motive

[24 Nov, 15:04 PM] The Viator killed Nature's Harmonic Simultaneous 4-Day Time Cube

[24 Nov, 16:28 PM] Robin Hood shot Mencellator as hemove across his landing.

[24 Nov, 09:58 AM] The Viator killed Amanita Arbury

[24 Nov, 12:51 PM] Zaphod killed American Psycho

[24 Nov, 12:05 PM] Beard Bird flew high above The Grape of Wrath's shield and avoided his sword to turn him into a nice house red

[24 Nov, 12:00 PM] Generator of Random Digits generated P( Mencellator's ball would hit him)=0 so killed him

[24 Nov, 10:07 AM] Baby-faced Lemming and The Viator outside lectures, k.i.l.l.i.n.g.

[19 Nov, 20:20 PM] The Man with Absolute Rest killed Salamonster

[23 Nov, 23:23 PM] One Man and his Beard narrowly escaped The Man with Absolute Rest and The Man With Absolute Machismo

[24 Nov, 10:09 AM] Look at you, you can't even lift that cannon you carry!

[24 Nov, 01:28 AM] St Brendan, by the Grace of God, drove the last remnants of Curiosity from his troubled mind. About time...

[23 Nov, 22:00 PM] RC Assassin saw Elaine Oliver with the corpse of Jack Leigh and stabbed them both

[23 Nov, 23:00 PM] Generator of Random Digits innocently watched tv when Mencellator made a miscalculation and failed to sneak up on him. The numbers came out in favour of the Generator of Random Digits

New on Friday, 23 November

[23 Nov, 21:44 PM] Maid Marion killed Zaphod

[23 Nov, 10:00 AM] Pickles killed Salamonster

[23 Nov, 18:34 PM] The Man with Absolute Motion was not a Jómsvikingar!

[22 Nov, 15:00 PM] Pickles killed Salamonster

[21 Nov, 18:22 PM] Pickles killed Salamonster following him after lectures

[19 Nov, 20:45 PM] Maid Marion killed The Man with Absolute Rest

[21 Nov, 13:00 PM] Pickles killed Salamonster following him after lectures

[23 Nov, 19:20 PM] Beard Bird had been eating bellow a portrait of Henry VIII and so knew his face when he stepped into hall for the last time

[23 Nov, 18:20 PM] Generator of Random Digits calculated the odds while cycling and squished The Grape of Wrath into the ground

[23 Nov, 17:42 PM] Dr Faust pwnt St Brendan

[23 Nov, 17:10 PM] The Man with Absolute Motion exchanged fire with Jejunal Infarction

[23 Nov, 16:01 PM] The Man with Absolute Motion killed The Man With Absolut Motif

[23 Nov, 14:34 PM] Pickles clashed with SDG

[23 Nov, 13:00 PM] SDG clashed but failed to kill each other Pickles

[23 Nov, 13:39 PM] The Grape of Wrath killed Mencellator

[23 Nov, 13:05 PM] Maid Marion killed Baby-faced Lemming

[23 Nov, 12:50 PM] Maid Marion got Zaphod with a rubber band through the heart

[23 Nov, 10:00 AM] Maid Marion killed Jack

[22 Nov, 13:30 PM] One Man and his Beard killed Hug Me!

[23 Nov, 10:02 AM] The Viator tried to teach The Man with Absolute Motive some principles of Mechanics, but received his own lesson.

[22 Nov, 21:37 PM] The Viator killed Mencellator

[23 Nov, 03:46 AM] Dr Faust killed Jack AGAIN

[20 Nov, 12:00 PM] Baby-faced Lemming and Beard Bird fought on King's Parade, which resulted in their mutual demise

[23 Nov, 00:00 AM] Baby-faced Lemming killed Maria

[20 Nov, 22:15 PM] Improper Duelling! In the middle of the street! The Man with Absolute Motion has none compared to The Viator.

New on Thursday, 22 November

[22 Nov, 22:45 PM] Baby-faced Lemming stabbed Zaphod

[22 Nov, 07:40 AM] The Man with Absolute Motive had heard An Assassin mention she was rowing early sho The Man with Absolute Motive got on his bike and shot her with a water pistol as she cycled by. Revenge is sweet

[19 Nov, 21:25 PM] The Viator decided that no kills are made to be broken so shot Beard Bird in the back

[22 Nov, 21:32 PM] The Grape of Wrath stabbed Beard Bird in the back; which apparently made him feel a little tired.

[22 Nov, 16:10 PM] St Brendan attempted to impose his monastic rule on Alice Band and got shot in the head with a water-pistol.

[22 Nov, 16:05 PM] A lurking Alice Band made short work of Maid Marion

[22 Nov, 15:26 PM] Towanda visits Jesus and gets American Psycho, who turns out to be not that psychopathic

[22 Nov, 13:11 PM] The Grape of Wrath killed Mencellator

[22 Nov, 12:00 PM] Beard Bird lurked behind a car for SDG to come into the open, before chasing him and shooting him down

[22 Nov, 10:00 AM] Maid Marion killed American Psycho

[22 Nov, 10:00 AM] Maid Marion killed Baby-faced Lemming

[22 Nov, 08:20 AM] Beard Bird was warming up when Henry VIII entered the boathouse and left life

[22 Nov, 00:15 AM] Zaphod killed American Psycho

[21 Nov, 23:42 PM] Curiosity killed Jack

[21 Nov, 22:47 PM] Towanda visits Catz for the second time to find Sol unarmed

[21 Nov, 22:16 PM] Steve follows Ludi in her journey

[21 Nov, 22:15 PM] Towanda ships Ludi off to Wonderland

[21 Nov, 21:10 PM] Zaphod killed Maria

[21 Nov, 19:50 PM] One Man and his Beard killed The Man with Absolute Motion

[21 Nov, 19:10 PM] While the SDG was skulking for Jejunal Infarction he happend upon Raven who shot him before he could reach for his gun.

[21 Nov, 18:50 PM] One Man and his Beard killed Alice Band

[21 Nov, 18:30 PM] Zaphod killed American Psycho

[21 Nov, 18:05 PM] One Man and his Beard killed Maid Marion

[21 Nov, 17:23 PM] Dr Faust killed St Brendan again with an RBG, in a valiant display of self defence, after being cornered and with one arm hacked to pieces with a rusty USB stick.

[21 Nov, 13:28 PM] The Man with Absolute Motive saw The Man with Absolute Motion distracted by the food he was about to eat so Bang killed him from behind

[21 Nov, 13:27 PM] Zaphod killed American Psycho

[21 Nov, 13:00 PM] The Man with Absolute Motive kisaw his path to hall rudely inhibitted by Henry VIII, so decided stepping over his bullet riddled corpse was easier

[21 Nov, 11:27 AM] Zaphod killed Maid Marion ...again

[21 Nov, 10:00 AM] The SDG stumbled across a heated battle between The Man with Absolute Rest and Beard Bird, after making sure The Man with Absolute Rest met an elaSticity end, the SDG was shot in the back. Again!

[21 Nov, 10:00 AM] The Man with Absolute Motive was in a standoff with The Man with Absolute Rest when he signalled to SDG to kill him. Having succeeded, The Man with Absolute Motive rewarded him with a face full of water

[21 Nov, 09:55 AM] Beard Bird was strolling around outside when who did he spy but Mencellator who was off gaurd, and very quickly off life

[21 Nov, 02:30 AM] Dr Faust killed St Brendan

[20 Nov, 21:56 PM] RC Assassin killed Jack Leigh Again! (but with more class this time)

[20 Nov, 18:43 PM] Baby-faced Lemming finally gets Don Raphael

[20 Nov, 18:23 PM] The Man with Absolute Motion stopped the Beard Bird

[20 Nov, 18:15 PM] The Man with Absolute Motive saw The Grape of Wrath lurking for him in the dinning queue so took appropriate measures with an RBG to enable him to eat

[20 Nov, 11:55 AM] Beard Bird waited until SDG thought the way was clear, then burst out and shot him in the back before he knew what hit him

[20 Nov, 09:55 AM] The Man with Absolute Motive waited atop a fire escape when Mencellator failed to look up until it was too late

[20 Nov, 09:50 AM] The Man with Absolute Motive was lurking atop a bridge when who but The Grape of Wrath passed, receiving a nice splatter effect

[19 Nov, 17:04 PM] Beard Bird found the door of Henry VIII open and found a space in his chest to plant a shot

[21 Nov, 15:27 PM] Zaphod killed Maid Marion

[19 Nov, 20:42 PM] Baby-faced Lemming killed Emma

[19 Nov, 15:54 PM] Beard Bird killed The Grape of Wrath

[22 Nov, 21:36 PM] Henry VIII killed Beard Bird

[22 Nov, 19:08 PM] Baby-faced Lemming displayed necrophilic intentions towards the corpse of Maid Marion

[21 Nov, 23:17 PM] The Viator had means and opportunity, but was not The Man with Absolute Motive, as Amanita Arbury shot an innocent

[22 Nov, 11:53 AM] Ben Weaver gets a visitor

[22 Nov, 12:00 PM] After an unsucsesful duel in the morning (ie no one died) the SDG was low on ammo. After lectures Beard Bird chased an unarmed SDG into a corner and shot him, AGAIN!

[21 Nov, 14:01 PM] Amy Booth killed Towanda the Avenger

[21 Nov, 18:29 PM] American Psycho mutilated the corpse of Maid Marion

New on Wednesday, 21 November

[20 Nov, 18:15 PM] Raven molested Alice Band in the shower. Mmmmm.

[20 Nov, 18:15 PM] Maid Marion mutilated the corpse of Zaphod with 20 minutes to go before he respawned

[19 Nov, 20:47 PM] Baby-faced Lemming is left disappointed by the already-dead Don Raphael

[21 Nov, 19:56 PM] RC Assassin mutilated the corpse of Jack Leigh, while Elaine Oliver looked on.

[21 Nov, 02:54 AM] Dr Faust ditched Jack with an RBG!

New on Tuesday, 20 November

[20 Nov, 19:27 PM] Zaphod killed Maid Marion

[19 Nov, 21:35 PM] ...Maid Marion killed The Viator

[20 Nov, 19:31 PM] Beard Bird killed The Grape of Wrath

[20 Nov, 12:00 PM] The Man with Absolute Motive and Baby-faced Lemming double killed with vanishing rubber bands galore

[20 Nov, 12:00 PM] SDG was shot in the back by Beard Bird.

New on Monday, 19 November

[19 Nov, 12:39 PM] SDG takes on the very discreet (read terribly transparent) Beard Bird.

[19 Nov, 13:00 PM] Baby-faced Lemming shot Maria in the head with an RBG. (one lemming falls off a cliff, the rest follow)

[19 Nov, 19:10 PM] Zaphod killed American Psycho

[19 Nov, 19:14 PM] Alice Band killed Don Raphael

[19 Nov, 18:21 PM] Alice Band killed Emma

[19 Nov, 20:00 PM] The Man with Absolute Rest killed Raven

[19 Nov, 13:13 PM] Jack didn't Hug Me! So I stabbed him.

[19 Nov, 12:47 PM] The Grape of Wrath got a little to close to Beard Bird and sliced his left arm off with a sword. Beard Bird countered with his right arm, delivering a fatal bang kill to The Grape of Wrath

[19 Nov, 12:05 PM] Beard Bird bang killed Henry VIII who was painfully unaware of his surroundings

[19 Nov, 09:55 AM] SDG tried to bang kill Beard Bird through a shield, resulting in a duel where Beard Bird sliced SDG in half

The Assassins' Guild - Updates

New on Tuesday, 27 November