Awards
Over the years many different accolades, some good, some.... not so good,
have been awarded to many people. This page lists all the awards and to
whom they have been awarded.
The holders of MAs and PhDs can be found here.
The chronological list of awards pages can be found here.
The Tombstone Award for Psychopathy
The Kenny Award for Dying Far Too Many Times
The Leek and Safe Award for Most Interesting Weaponry
The Darwin Award for Death by Stupidity
The Harland Quinn Golden Quill for the Most Amusing Reports
The Brutus Award for Best Betrayal
The Obfuscated Tutorial System Award for Silliest Pseudonym
The Zaphod Beeblebrox Award for Style
The Loloccoon Award for Survival
The Lemming Award for the First to Die
The Catherine Zentile Award for Least Innocent Innocent
The Yellow Streak Award for Running Away
The Laurel and Hardy award for most amusing double act
The Reversed Burden of Johannes Award for unintentionally killing innocents
The 'Do you have my fish?' Award for Excuse Least Likely To Get Someone To Open The Door
The David and Goliath Award for Best Giant-Killing Activity by a New Player
The David Duffit award for Secrecy and Deception
The Mario Sainz-Martinez Award for Cowwuption
The Richard Gibson Award for Marksmanship
The Dr Kimble Award for Surviving the Longest Time on the Wanted List
The Three Hours Early Award for Paranoia
The "Nice Try" Award for a valiant effort
The Banker's Bonus Award for Profit
The Maximus Decimus Meridius Award for Best Fight to the Death
The Order of the Black Coat Award for Application of the Art of Disguise
The Bandwidth Bandit Award for Non-Textual Reports
The Gary Lineker Award for Sportsmanship
The 'Ginger Cake' Award for the 'Smoothest' Kill
The 'My Hero' Award for the Biggest Fanclub
The Orange Scarf Award for subtlety
The Robocop Award for killing wanted criminals
The Butch Cassidy Award for Most Doomed Killing Spree
The Jeffery Archer Award for Prolific Writing
The Pistols At Dawn Award for an Addiction to Duelling
The 'I Shot the Sheriff' Award for Butchering Cops
The *Twitch* Award for Plot Derailment
The Cuba '62 Award for Narrowly Averted Disaster
The Koom Valley Award for Best Ambush
The Show Must Go On Award for Devotion to The Guild
The Spawncamper Award for kill farming
The Couldn't Make It Up Award for Ironic Pseudonym Choice
The Lawyers At Dawn Award for Disputing Everything
The Love Bug Award for Unresolved Sexual Tension
The My Coat Is Just Big Boned Award for Weapon Concealment
The Police Hero Medal for Outstanding Service
The Red/Blue Colourblind Award for Teamkilling
The Three Weeks Early Award for Signing Up Early
The Watcher On The Walls Award for Dedicated Ambushing
The [REDACTED] Award for [REDACTED]
The Fake Simon Award for Psychological Warfare
The Gentleman's Award for Reverse Profit
The George R. R. Martin Award for commitment to the Plot
The Judas Award for trying to betray someone, but they miraculously live thanks to the power of the almighty
The Kit Jenkins award for most foolish pseudonym
The Mexican Standoff Award for Tensest Situation
- May Week 2013: Alison Madgwick, Cheryl Weedon and Tristan Roberts
- Michaelmas 2017: Mahika Dixit, Thomas Carey and Ward Van Der Schoot
- Lent 2018: Dani Cugini and Valentin Foley
- Michaelmas 2019: Luxy Xu
- Lent 2020: Ellery Gopaoco, Dorothy Zidkova, Nico Puthu and Henry London
- Michaelmas 2021: Dylan McDermott, Alannah Atherton, Louis Strehlow, Thomas O'Hare, and all the Titallian Mafia
- Lent 2023: Bertie Politi and Reuben Price
- Michaelmas 2023: Axel Agrawal, Abi Crowdi, Thomas Brockett, and others
The Peace in the Middle East award for Fragile Alliances
The Speedrun Award for Rapid Target Clearing
The Cugini Award for Psychofreshery
The Fluffy Bunny Collective for the Least Threatening Alliance
- Lent 2017: Peterchilledwards
- Lent 2018: The Regina Phalange Line
- Lent 2019: Sheamol Obeda, Yuhang Xie, Dmitri Amelin, Jacob Rowlands, Jack Harrison, Patrick Farnworth, Julian James, Jane Ambler, Helena Read, Beth Holmes, and Amelia Rout
- Lent 2020: the King's incos
- Michaelmas 2022: The entire Police Force
- Lent 2023: The Incobash Squad
- Michaelmas 2023: The Dark Brotherhood
The Girton Award for the Kill Furthest from Cambridge
The Kife Award for Worst Weapon Labelling
The LinkedIn Award for Networking
The Alvin, Simon, Theodore Award for Most Amusing Triple-Act
The BAFTA Award for Best Actress
The Charge of the Light Brigade award for Brave but Doomed Attacks
The Not Dead Yet Award for failure to admit defeat
The Spawncamper Award for Cheapest Kill
The Terminator Award for Best "I'll Be Back" moment
The Dante Award for Divine Comedy
The 'I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream' Award for Inventive Communication
The Cain Award for Killing Family Members
The Fancy Seeing You Here Award for Random Encounters
The Laurel Award for most amusing single-act
The London Award for Excessive Firepower
The Pacifist Award for Dedication to Not Using Weapons
The Rasputin Award for Why Won't You Just Die?!
The COVID-19 award for best Self Isolation
The Hidden in Plain Sight Award for Worst Ambush
The Martin Lester award for special (ab)use of bins
The Pedants' Award for Attention to Detail
The Adam Smith Award for Services to Economics
The April (Liu) is Your Fool award for Going Wanted Far Too Many Times
The Dirty Dozen Award for the Most Amusing Duodecuple Act
The FIFA Independent Ethics Committee Award for Legitimate Business Practices
The League of Super Evil Award for Non-Game Based Nefariousness
The Leroy Jenkins Award for Joyfully Suicidal Activity
The rotten quill award for least comprehensible yet funny reports
The Vendetta Award for Best Revenge
The "Free Pizza??" Award for Most Avoidable Death
The Alanis Morrisette Award for Irony
The Happy Feet Award for Bullet Dodging
The Immonulus Award for the Least Dynamic Duo
The Mounted Division Award for Bicycle Warfare
The Nuclear Submarine Award for Mutually Assured Destruction
The Other Spawncamper Award for also kill farming
- Lent 2018: Leo Zlotnikov, Joe Malt, and Samuel Sully
The Platinum Trophy Award for Completionism
The Social Butterfly Knife Award for Society Sweeping
The Truman Show Award for Breaking the Fourth Wall
The Walter Cronkite Award for Best News Headline