Cloak & Dagger The Assassins' Guild - Week 4 News

Sunday, 14 February

[13:55 PM] A member of a loose coalition of players consisting of Tom Flynn, Claire Farey, Curtis Reubens, Kai Hugtenburg, Freddie Brewer, Joe Tomkinson, Gwilym Kuiper, James Brotherston, Fred Alford, Georgie Turner & Ellie Holderness AKA Judas AKA Gryph, Griff, Gryff and Griph (James Brotherston) is counter to the revolution, sent down by el Che

el Che reports:

James came to kill me. He tried my door. It was locked. He knocked. We had a chat. He then made the very bad move of going to my kitchen to have a chat with a member of the police. I could hear all of this going on from inside my room, so I went and shot him. I'd give him a socialism rating of 2/10 (not good enough to be left alive).

Judas reports:

Alas, my attempt at bringing down a mafia from the inside has failed at the last hurdle. Congratulations Freddie Brewer, you have beaten me... admittedly by doing absolutely nothing, but nonetheless you have beaten me.

Tuesday, 16 February

[14:02 PM] Handsome Jack sends Victarion Greyjoy (Daniel Wong) to the Drowned God

Handsome Jack reports:

Sup, it's Jack here, just checking in on you toerags to see how you're doing. How you doing? Doing good? Yeah? Good good, that's great, good for you. Anyhoo, I stabbed your pal Daniel outside our mutual supervision. In his own words, 'There was a line, and you crossed it!'. That's me pal, backstabber supreme. I mean, I'd feel bad and all, but a) no morals b) I took a hefty bribe on this one and c) no morals. Sorry Daniel, significant quantities of chocolate is a high price. RIP little buddy. RIP. The chocolate is really good, by the way.

[16:30 PM] The Game of Thrones theme tune drops the bass on _____ _________ (Jonny Phillips)

The Game of Thrones theme tune reports:

Thought you couldn't be killed by music? Think again. The Game of Thrones theme tune killed Jonny Phillips today at 4:30pm by dropping the bass...onto his head*!

I am immensely grateful for the aid of an accomplice, whose help proved...instrumental.

*For clarity, this was a large cardboard box marked "the bass".

[18:00 PM] Jon Snow (Twm Stone) once again dies in mysterious circumstances, this time to Jaqen H'ghar

Jon Snow reports:

I was bearing. And then I wasn't bearing. And then Jaqen H'ghar killed me. *sigh*

Wednesday, 17 February

[10:00 AM] danger kitten has something to say...

danger kitten reports:

mrrrrrrrowwwwww. HHHHHHSSSSST

[20:35 PM] The Imp makes an observation

The Imp reports:

Open season has begun? And I'm incompetent? What an exciting time to be alive! Let the mind games begin.....

Thursday, 18 February

[12:00 PM] George R. R. Martin completely fails to do anything

George R. R. Martin reports:

Next time I write a book, remind me to make the main characters actually turn up for their [CENSORED] lectures.

[13:10 PM] George R. R. Martin finally decides to bump off Littlefingers (Dominic Yates)

George R. R. Martin reports:


DO: Work out who your target is by recognising the people walking with him. It took me a while to identify Littlefingers after he left his lecture at 1pm today. Luckily, he was walking with Walder Frey and Jaqen H'ghar (as well as an unknown innocent player), making the identification process considerably easier.

DON'T: Try to balance a 3-shot nerf jolt against your chest, behind the A5-sized hardback book you're using to "conceal" it. This isn't exactly the most effective way to conceal a ranged weapon. It's also best to avoid doing this while simultaneously carrying a laptop and several more books with your other arm. Let alone while trying to tail a 4-person group through the post-lecture crowd on a very narrow pavement.

DO: Employ discretion and variety while tailing a group (or indeed an individual). I walked several metres behind the group for a minute or so - then, as they advanced up [ROYAL PROCESSION], I crossed the road, accelerated ahead of them and looked backwards at them for a while. Textbook stuff.

DON'T: Walk straight past the Fudge Kitchen without taking a fudge sample. Why would you miss out on free fudge!? Minus 10 million assassin points, George R. R. Martin.

DO: Let's change perspectives for a bit, shall we? If you're in a group and you suspect that you're being tailed, mix things up so that you can identify your tail. When Littlefingers, Jaqen H'ghar and the innocent went into the Fudge Kitchen, leaving Walder Frey outside, I assumed that they were cunningly trying to lose me/spot me lurking.

DON'T: Walk straight back out of the Fudge Kitchen without pausing to identify your tail. This was a Very Bad Move by Littlefingers and co.

DO: Kill Littlefingers with a single nerf bullet to the centre of the back, while he's walking past the little bookshop in the little outdoor alleyway beside the Arts Theatre.

DON'T: Kill Jaqen H'ghar - he needs to be left alive, so that he can keep killing off Jon Snow.

Friday, 19 February

[11:05 AM] Sleepy Gary kills The Imp (Yaron Bernstein) with a crossbow in the latrine

Sleepy Gary reports:

My good friend Ed Stark is a spider who sits at the centre of a web of information, and this morning he passed on to me the location of The Imp. I tailed him into the mens' room after his lecture - that is where we carry out our dirty work, is it not? - and disposed of him efficiently.

The Imp reports:

A tactical error I had made, taunting the police while incompetent and, unknown to them, completely unarmed. I guess Sleepy Gary could not help himself when he saw my message, and so he decided to come for me. I didn't notice him follow me into the latrines, and also didn't notice the bullet enter my body. But I did notice the blood, and lots of it, as I slowly slipped into unconsciousness. Fairly ironic that I was murdered while on the toilet.

[22:55 PM] The Lord of Light abandons Stannis Baratheon (Gabriel Cradden) in favour of General Tapioca and General Alcazar

General Tapioca reports:

Last night myself (General Tapioca) and General Alcazar went on a patrol to hunt down known rebels and Picaros. Despite our excellent infiltration skills, however, all but one evaded our grasp. The dissident in question was Stannis Baratheon; opening his door to clear a seemingly empty corridor he was met instead by a hail of automatic fire. His demise was fast, brutal and messy. Viva la republica de los platanos.

Stannis Baratheon reports:

As I sat quietly working, I heard a knock on my door; I offered a â??hello?â?? but no answer came. I was certain it was an assassin; my heart pounding at a rate and intensity that genuinely worried me for a second, I considered my options. In retrospect, the obvious best option would have been to NOT OPEN THE DOOR but the adrenaline must have gone to my head and I thought I could take on whoever was out there with my one-shot, minuscule, Nerf Jolt.

I was not prepared for the onslaught that faced me: not only were there two assassins, but they were heavily armed with high-speed, high-calibre rubber band guns. Hopelessly outgunned, my one bullet bouncing feebly off a wall, I fell to the hail of bands that they unleashed.

Let this be a cautionary tale to all those hubristic enough to think they can just open their door and gun down anyone waiting for them out there.

General Alcazar reports:

So, General Alcazar and mi amigo Tapioca after mucho traveling around finally find someone actually in theeir room. After knocking a couple of times, thees Stannis Baratheon, Caramba! he opens the door just enough for Tapioca to open fire. However we do not know if hee has been killed and he attempts to shoot us. Thees fails as I make sure hee is really dead with a bullet to the heart. Adios

Saturday, 20 February

[17:30 PM] Khal Drogo (Alexander Bailey) falls off his horse, courtesy of Leo "Steve" Kayean

Leo "Steve" Kayean reports:

Operation: "A land very far far away"

Location: [REDACTED], but an out of the way place.

Targets: Khal Drogo, with another secondary target close by should I fail on the first.

Weapons: Two nerf triads. I'm liking the triad for this one as it can hold its own in a fairly heavy fight if there's some cover, yet is discreet enough that I shouldn't alert any corridormates to my nefarious intentions.

Let's roll!

1: Get there

Easier said than done, I've never been here before and there are big roads and heavy traffic. But my Falcon's really quite nimble I arrive at [REDACTED] fairly speedily.

2. Get into the accommodation

So I have to dodge the lodge as I go in as I'm thinking the porters might not be too pleased if they knew my intetntions. Once thru the security it's not long before I'm outside the block. Ah, yes, 'Automatic Door', that makes life easier...

... or not as it transpires that the automatic door flashes red at me and refuses to let me in. Have they got iris scanners in this place? It doesn't matter tho as a girl walks up behind me and swipes her card in a spectacularly inconspicuous card reader and I tailgate in. She even held the door open for me!

3. Find the room

Can't savour this victory for long tho as there is a complicated building plan on the wall in front of me and I have no idea where to go. Worse, there are college staff offices opposite whose occupants might challenge me if I tailgate in and then look lost. So I head to the second floor, where he lives, and hope for the best. Turns out I find the room on my first try.

4. Make the kill

I can hear voices, but there's a decision here - knock or burst in? If the door is locked, then attempting to burst reveals my intentions completely and I won't get in. On the flipside, if I knock and he inquires who is there, I give away my position, saving him if his door is unlocked. Dilemma. My inclination is generally to burst in, but there's a card reader on this door and I'm not sure if it'll be locked automatically. I decide to knock. He says come in, and I oblige.

5. Get out

Accommodation is no less of a maze on the way out, [REDACTED] is no less far away from [REDACTED], but I return safely. To the bar to celebrate!

Leo "Steve" Kayean ending log.

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