The Assassins' Guild: Mayweek 2014 Game Awards
For various achievements and entertainments, the following awards are presented:
- The Kenny Award for dying far too many times:
- Curtis Reubens, for his 7 deaths, possibly a result of having a bounty on his head for more than half the game.
Honourable mention to Christof Epaminondas, who "only" died 4 times - all to Ted Loveday.
- The Spawncamper Award for kill farming:
- Ted Loveday for killing Christof Epaminondas. Again. And again. And again....
- The Laurel And Hardy Award for most amusing double-act:
- Danielle C. Saunders and Cheryl Weedon for many Umpire shenanigans, including placing significant bounties on each other.
- The Orange Scarf Award for subtlety:
- Max Baxter-Allen for charging directly across an entire garden party with a katana held aloft.
- The Darwin Award for death by stupidity:
- Thomas Ruddle for having a completely clear view of the above, not reacting in any way and consequently getting very killed.
- The Yellow Streak Award for running away:
- Kamile Rastenyte, Nastassia McAdam and Alex Fairclough for failing to make an attempt on (heavily bountied) Umpire Cheryl Weedon, despite her standing right there.
Honourable mention to Thomas Ruddle for using a projectile weapon on Curtis Reubens in a pub, realising that was disallowed and taking off down the street at high speed, abandoning said weapon.
- The
Harland
Quinn
Golden
Quill
for the most amusing reports:
- Curtis Reubens, for Foxface's impressive poetic reports, including but not limited to haikus, sonnets, limericks and a full-blown parody of The Raven.
Honourable mention to that one report by Douglas Hall, clocking in at well over 1000 words.
Also: Thomas Ruddle's terrifyingly accurate (and psychopathic) Tom Nook.
- The Banker's Bonus Award for profit:
- Thomas Ruddle, for claiming the bounty on Umpire Danielle C. Saunders.
Honourable mention to Emily Room for collecting the bounty on Curtis Reubens twice in just over four hours.
- The Pistols At Dawn Award for an addiction to duelling:
- Matthew Fitch for challenging four different players - not including non-players - to single combat following minigames.
- The Reversed Burden of Johannes Award for unintentionally killing innocents:
- Tom Flynn for stabbing a Thomas Ruddle lookalike at the cardboard boat race (and having the honesty to report it.)
- The Brutus Award for best betrayal:
- Curtis Reubens, for agreeing to team up with Emily Room and Ben Weber to kill Ted Loveday at the Union, and then backstabbing them both.
- The Richard Gibson Award for Marksmanship:
- Douglas Hall, who it turns out is very good at hitting people's limbs but less so the rest of them, occasionally at a detriment to his vital status.
- The Obfuscated Tutorial System Award for silliest pseudonym:
- Ted Loveday, for his signup information message in which a certain field contained only "Not sure about the pseudonym - what do w need it for? xx" - with inevitable consequences.
- The "nice try" Award for a valiant effort
- Peter Jordan, who, as well as some impressive minigame showings, went on a very extensive raid - which resulted in one kill.
- The Watcher On The Walls Award for dedicated ambushing
- Douglas Hall, for camping outside two separate black tie events in attempts to catch multiple assassins turning up.
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