The Assassins' Guild - Week 3 News

Another failed attempt to assassinate Thorin, Son of Thrain, Son of Thror, King under the Mountain today. I may need to try a more stealthy tactic in future.

Just after sundown the dragon returned yet again. No doubt still after the hoards of wealth I keep deep within my mountain, he laid the mountain under siege. Having learnt caution from my previous encounter with this beast, I did not venture outside to face him and stood firm within my kingdom, hoping that the forces holding the door closed would not fail me. They did not, and after a considerable amount of time spent lurking around the vicinity of my mountain, the beast gave up and retreated. I hope that this time it finally has learnt that my kingdom and wealth is not to be taken that easily.

Stomp! Stomp! Stomp! Rawr! *sound of a building being demolished* Translation: The Trollsaurus is delighted that he was able to find dinner today. He was busy trampling over [UNSPECIFIED LOCATION] when a tasty meal appeared in the form of an incompetent Teppic. The Trollsaurus wasted no time in lunging at its prey, grabbing it with its long sharp teeth before swallowing it whole. The Trollsaurus thought it was a little too salty for his liking, but it was otherwise delicious.

Today I flew over to Christ's to find Alexandre Lopoukhine (Sasha). I found that the craters there were covered with very heavy dustbin lids (this being especially problematic since soup dragons don't have opposable thumbs). Seeing the lid of an adjacent crater had been left open, I wandered round inside for a while but couldn't find a way through. Then I managed to follow a clanger into the other crater but to no avail.

It came to my attention that I was labelled incompetent. Obviously some mistake was made. Such a false allegation may not be tolerated again. At 20:30 this evening I ambushed and dispatched Emily Room. The plan was executed to perfection. On the general understanding that we would be meeting mutual friends, we both prepared our strategies. Knowing I was "incompetent", she approached the room with dual pistols foolishly bared before her. Knowing she would arrive in such an aggressive stance I took to the shadows. Watching her approach, I timed my attack to perfection, knifing her in the chest moments before she fired. Her death will serve as a reminder for any who have underestimated me.