The Assassins' Guild: Lent 2006 Game Awards
For various achievements and entertainments, the following awards are presented:
- The Lemming Award for the first to die:
- Richard Manns, following in the recent fine tradition of Trinitarians, was stabbed by Michael Conterio whilst sitting next to the Umpire having dinner.
- The Holzhauer Award for psychopathy:
- Tom Booth, for killing eleven players.
- The Robocop Award for killing wanted criminals:
- Adam Baird Fraser and Jake Corteen both managed to kill 2 apiece on the same evening.
- also The Law:
- Felicity Boyce and Philip Bielby, who managed one each during their respective Chief of Police careers.
- The 'I Shot the Sheriff' Award for butchering cops:
- Tom Booth managed an impressive nine in as many days.
- The Usual Suspect:
- Philip Bielby, who managed to get another four during his several minutes of Wantedness.
- The Mario Sainz-Martinez Award for cowwuption:
- David Smith, Jenny Scott-Thompson, Richard Kirkdale and Stuart Cuthbertson all went corrupt first to Louis Jagger and then to Tom Booth.
- The Most Ironic Death Award:
- James O'Driscoll killed David Jordan with a toy hamster in revenge.
- The Dr Kimble Award for surviving the longest time on the wanted list:
- Tom Booth, with a whopping 9 days and 23 hours.
- The Kenny Award for dying far too many times:
- Jake Corteen, who was resurrected specifically for the purpose of being killed more and managed to achieve the rank of ‘Very Special Constable’.
- The David Duffit Award for secrecy and deception:
- The Umpire for scaring a number of players, in particular Michael Wallace, by inventing an extra player: G.I.Bob.
- The 'Do you have my fish?' Award for excuse least likely to get someone to open the door:
- The SWAT Team for attacking Alex Labram with the opening gambit, "Excuse me, could you direct me to the room of Mr Edward Heaney," his next door neighbour.
- The Laurel And Hardy Award for most amusing double-act:
- Tom Wootten, Martin Lester and Tom Booth (yes, I can count), who exchanged a series of picture reports.
- The Darwin Award for death by stupidity:
- Christopher Doman for leaning out of his (ground floor) window to talk to the SWAT raid team that was after him.
- The Reversed Burden of Johannes Award for unintentionally killing innocents:
- Johannes Nordstrom, of course - he claimed that people who rang his doorbell "have a 70% chance of being a legal target."
- The Catherine Zentile Award for least innocent innocent:
- 'Dave the Muso' from King's, who took exception to Samuel Borin lurking his neighbour attacked him with a paper knife.
- The Brutus Award for best betrayal:
- Stephen McCann shot his long time ally, Aidan Robison, quite literally, in the back.
- Tom Booth, for arranging to have his minions shot by Alex Labram and then claimed "it was only a test" of their abilities.
- The Concerned Citizen Award::
- None of the citizens seemed terribly concerned - Nick Plummer, Tom Booth and Ross Edmondson got one Wanted Criminal each.
- The Yellow Streak Award for running away:
- Michael Wallace, who again ran away a lot. It's looking up for him, though - he was spotted entirely stationary and in a moment of madness someone even ran away from him.
- The William Tell Award for marksmanship:
- Tom Booth and Philippa Cox both tried - and failed - to backstab their respective allies at close range.
- The Obfuscated Tutorial System Award for silliest pseudonym:
- Withheld. No exciting pseudonyms this game. :(
for the most amusing reports:
- Louis Jagger
- The Bandwidth Bandit Award for non-textual reports:
- Sarah Donnelly, for cute (and kinky) pictures.
- also horribly abusing JANET:
- Nick Plummer, Ed Heaney and Simeon Bird, who also submitted some amusing pictures.
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