The Assassins' Guild: Lent 2006 Game Awards


For various achievements and entertainments, the following awards are presented:

The Lemming Award for the first to die:
Richard Manns, following in the recent fine tradition of Trinitarians, was stabbed by Michael Conterio whilst sitting next to the Umpire having dinner.
The Holzhauer Award for psychopathy:
Tom Booth, for killing eleven players.
The Robocop Award for killing wanted criminals:
Adam Baird Fraser and Jake Corteen both managed to kill 2 apiece on the same evening.
also The Law:
Felicity Boyce and Philip Bielby, who managed one each during their respective Chief of Police careers.
The 'I Shot the Sheriff' Award for butchering cops:
Tom Booth managed an impressive nine in as many days.
The Usual Suspect:
Philip Bielby, who managed to get another four during his several minutes of Wantedness.
The Mario Sainz-Martinez Award for cowwuption:
David Smith, Jenny Scott-Thompson, Richard Kirkdale and Stuart Cuthbertson all went corrupt first to Louis Jagger and then to Tom Booth.
The Most Ironic Death Award:
James O'Driscoll killed David Jordan with a toy hamster in revenge.
The Dr Kimble Award for surviving the longest time on the wanted list:
Tom Booth, with a whopping 9 days and 23 hours.
The Kenny Award for dying far too many times:
Jake Corteen, who was resurrected specifically for the purpose of being killed more and managed to achieve the rank of ‘Very Special Constable’.
The David Duffit Award for secrecy and deception:
The Umpire for scaring a number of players, in particular Michael Wallace, by inventing an extra player: G.I.Bob.
The 'Do you have my fish?' Award for excuse least likely to get someone to open the door:
The SWAT Team for attacking Alex Labram with the opening gambit, "Excuse me, could you direct me to the room of Mr Edward Heaney," his next door neighbour.
The Laurel And Hardy Award for most amusing double-act:
Tom Wootten, Martin Lester and Tom Booth (yes, I can count), who exchanged a series of picture reports.
The Darwin Award for death by stupidity:
Christopher Doman for leaning out of his (ground floor) window to talk to the SWAT raid team that was after him.
The Reversed Burden of Johannes Award for unintentionally killing innocents:
Johannes Nordstrom, of course - he claimed that people who rang his doorbell "have a 70% chance of being a legal target."
The Catherine Zentile Award for least innocent innocent:
'Dave the Muso' from King's, who took exception to Samuel Borin lurking his neighbour attacked him with a paper knife.
The Brutus Award for best betrayal:
Stephen McCann shot his long time ally, Aidan Robison, quite literally, in the back.
Cassius:
Tom Booth, for arranging to have his minions shot by Alex Labram and then claimed "it was only a test" of their abilities.
The Concerned Citizen Award::
None of the citizens seemed terribly concerned - Nick Plummer, Tom Booth and Ross Edmondson got one Wanted Criminal each.
The Yellow Streak Award for running away:
Michael Wallace, who again ran away a lot. It's looking up for him, though - he was spotted entirely stationary and in a moment of madness someone even ran away from him.
The William Tell Award for marksmanship:
Tom Booth and Philippa Cox both tried - and failed - to backstab their respective allies at close range.
The Obfuscated Tutorial System Award for silliest pseudonym:
Withheld. No exciting pseudonyms this game. :(
The Harland Quinn Golden Quill for the most amusing reports:
Louis Jagger
The Bandwidth Bandit Award for non-textual reports:
Sarah Donnelly, for cute (and kinky) pictures.
also horribly abusing JANET:
Nick Plummer, Ed Heaney and Simeon Bird, who also submitted some amusing pictures.

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