hoopla! reports:
Saw BJ looming on the horizon and ran away with Proffesional Librarian. Hid round the corner to ambush them. They ran away too. Cue lots of paranoia, getting lost and the lamest ball crash ever.
Ivy reports:
Coming round a corner at the end of my corridor (having left something behind), I ran into Ivy. She drew an XP, I drew a Storm, we fired, there was much water. We duelled for it in the courtyard, and she was outranged and shot.
Ivy reports:
Ooops. I ran into Bryony, not myself. Running into myself would be really really bad.
Leader of the People's Democratic Kakistocracy reports:
Three girls walking to Newnham who immediately spotted Chronos with a large water gun and requested he didn't shoot the flowers. He claimed to be allied with them, and therefore not shooting them. Nobody would point out which was which so I took a guess at two of them, got it wrong, then killed the other. Worth it in points values, better watch out for those innocents though.
The Prinny Squad reports:
we wanna go to the carnival dood!
Deuce reports:
I left the garden party early (having just got there, to be honest) and went punting instead from Madgalene. As I punted merrily past Tit Hall, however, I spotted a beard, with an Umpire attached to it. And sitting next to him was one Lucie Santiz. I craftily began to steer the punt towards the wall whereon she sat, being noticed by everyone in the area except my intended victim, who appeared engrossed with her phone.
Approaching the victim, I threw the punt pole into the arms of my companions, leapt into the punt and grabbed my RBG, letting loose a lethal hail of rubbery death which annihilated poor Lucie rather rapidly. Unfortunately, the smoothness of the kill was rather lost when I attempted to make my getaway and dropped the punt pole, so we had to scrabble around with the paddly thing to get it back.
hoopla! reports:
Erm.. whoops. That *should* have been 17:55. So I'll put up the report then and we can throw this one to the void... yes?
Mr. Fluffy Ex-Umpire reports:
Well, we can throw it to the void if you fix it. But no-one else can.
Leader of the People's Democratic Kakistocracy reports:
I spotted Ed Sapeira in black tie walking with two people, both groups hesitated until they started running, and we pursued. Took a potshot at Simeon with the supersoaker, as he was in normal clothes but missed. He and ABF then ran into college where we lurked them muchly, but as the college was sealed for the ball we could not find them.
Zombie Locky reports:
I walked. From King's Hedges near the A14. Past Oblivion. Through town. All around Sainsbury's. To Trinity and the St. John's queue. Up the queue. And back down the queue again. And round Caius. And up the queue again.
A friend told me that Julia Bichard was in the queue somewhere.
So I went back down the queue again. And round Caius. And up the queue again. And was just about to give up and go home when I saw the lovely Laura Ingle. Then Queen of Cool. So I walked up to her and shot her.
And then I walked again...
Zombie Locky reports:
...and I walked down Sidney Street. And past Next. And bought a dodgy Big Issue from a dodgy "trainee vendor". And I walked past the Christ's queue. And into Lion Yard for a visit to the public facilities. And I walked down St Andrew's Street.
And then I saw Banichi on a bike and a woman cycling just behind him. He smiled mischievously. And when they passed me, I heard Ed saying something about "That guy over there..." And I ran. And she said "Ah shoot!". So I did.
And then I walked. Across Parker's Piece. Down Mill Road. I log on to here.
And I find that for two hours of walking in steelies and carrying a full supersoaker on my back and almost constant paranoia I have gained 20 sodding points from 2 kills.
Deuce reports:
Since nothing vastly of interest happened today, I'll report this as an attempt, even though it wasn't, really. Well, it could have been. Perhaps. It also makes me look cooler and much more 133+ than I actually am, so assassins will cower in terror at my passing and beautiful women will want to go to bed with me. Or not.
JCR garden party this afternoon, consumed much more alcohol than the doctor recommends. There may have been some sort of a fight, which I may have lost, and may have returned early to my room with a bad headache (having been dropped on my temple) and a foul mood. Slept off the drink but neither the headache nor the foul mood, and having missed dinner, thought I might go to see when Argos was opening tomorrow and whether I could eat somewhere. I did not go armed, having given up all pretence of trying to win the game and knowing that I don't even own weaponry that would give me a chance against a supersoaker.
On the way back from Argos, I spotted Time Bandit at the top of Trumpington Street, walking his bike. He saw me and glared suspiciously. Whether he was confused by my lack of reaction or that I was not obviously carrying any weapons I don't know, but he didn't make any serious attempt to attack me, and I quickened my pace a little so that he wouldn't have to keep looking dodgily at me all the time.
If that's the reaction I get when apparently unarmed in future, I may have to try it more often... Of course my cunning plan has now been given away by that very statement, but whatever.
Um, damn. Clearly this happened on Monday rather than Tuesday, since 20.00 Tuesday has not happened yet. I just forgot to change the day when reporting it. Not that it's really that important, but someone may want to move it if it's annoying them.
Ivy reports:
In Cambridge's darkest hour a hero shall arise to combat evil, and he shall be supported by that famed benefactor J Doe and his admiring journeyman Ric. And the name of the hero chosen to right the wrongs of the score table, he who runs away so he can run away another day, would appear to be Jonathan Woollgar.
This evil is terrified, honest.
Victor Fries reports:
Next time I'll shoot Will Someone Tell Me Why I Am Doing This??!!'s accomplices if they are blatantly trying to track us with mobile phones. I assume they are full water even in formal wear? Putting on a suit for assassins' purposes (when the assassin is running about with a 270) seems totally silly.
"Can I shoot him with the CPS? Can I? Can I?"
Zombie Locky reports:
Said hero and benefactors were then joined by a heavily armed ginger one very soon afterwards.
We didn't find anyone else all night, despite meandering the whole town. Apparently, no-one found anyone else either. Weirdest Mayweek I've played in so far...
Mr. Fluffy Ex-Umpire reports:
I note that this was reported yesterday, so it almost certainly didn't happen today.
Mr. Fluffy Ex-Umpire reports:
We open with a roomful of bored assassins and an evening in which nothing much seems to be happening. Apart from a minor false alarm earlier in which we failed to find an unsubtle assassin knocking on a neighbour's door, none of us had seen any action all day, so when it seemed that we might manage to convince Zombie Locky to come and attack Newnham, we jumped at the chance. The irony, of course, being that we were somewhat removed from Newnham at the time and had to rush over there ourselves to be sure of meeting him.
We hid behind a van (registration W689PDX) opposite the p'lodge to follow the hapless Highlander into Newnham. Unfortunately, a curmudgeonly security guard came over to ask us to quit our lurkplace at just the right time for all of us to miss Lachlan McLean's entrance into the college.
Having relocated inside, we were left working under the mistaken assumption that we had beaten the target into the college. Due to a breakdown of communications, we were left approaching the target area from only two directions instead of three, the one we failed to cover being the one that, as it turned out, would have taken Zombie Locky from behind.
The final mistake, at least as far as things went concerning myself, was that we assumed that the hypothetical ambusher against whom we were taking precautions would have chosen to honour the ancient assassins' tradition of hiding in the nearby toilet instead of the actual ambush spot which Zombie Locky chose, which was behind a pane of glass. Sadly the rest of the team was too close behind on the stairs and a stray shot found its way between the banisters before we could all get out of the way.
The Prinny Squad reports:
So Carrie had convinced Locky to come to Newnham... only we weren't there either, We dashed over there narrowly missing Tom Booth, and lurked the entrance for a good fifteen minutes with our cunning accomplice W689PDX until some loony shouted at us for being on "Private Property." (a.k.a the Sidgewick site.) We decided that Locky could have used his super-human speed to get there before us.
dood! who's W689PDX?
Ssssh! that's our secret weapon! - anyway, we decided to head to Peile building and check IRC. We didn't think Locky had gotten past our sentries, and when we got there, split into two groups, to come at the room from top and bottom on the second and ground floors.
They told you to go along the first floor dood!
Yeah well, lucky I didn't. Locky had it covered. Sadly, he also had the top floor covered, and shot the amazing-technicolour-Biltcliffe before he could get out of the way. Then we backed off a bit.
Zombie Locky reports:
Mill Road - Mawson Road - Glisson Road - Harvey Road ("I must be bonkers!") - Hills Road - Lensfield Road - Tennis Court Road ("This really is suicidal!") - Pembroke Street - Botolph Lane - Silver Street - Sidgwick Avenue ("OK now it's getting difficult.")
Behooded and walking quickly, I made my way to Newnham, where I was expecting to find Carrie in an unlocked door with her RBG pointed at me. I didn't know she was in Mem Court at the time. I made it to Peile and tried to force the door, but it was locked. I waited opposite it with RBG trained thereon but there was no response. So I silently crept past (which was roughly the point when Xanth glimpsed me from below, a minute before Mr. Fluffy Ex-Umpire and Carrie arrived from above) and I waited in an alcove behind doors with glass panes for the ambush to arrive. Adam and Xanth got confused as to whether it was safe to come down the stairs where I had been standing all of 120 seconds earlier, and he got stuck at the bottom of a pile of descending people as my bands found his stomach.
Mrs. Fluffy Ex-Umpire reports:
I was bored... I couldn't help but ask if anyone would come kill me... I wanted something to happen... I'm sorry adam had to die for my fun...
So where were we... oh yes, adam was shot by Zombie Locky as I prevented him leaping backwards but myself and dave ran for it. After a brief calming of nerves I returned and had a conversation with adam with Zombie Locky just behind a nearby door. We exchanged shots but carried identical weapons so it was a bit of a stalemate.
But hark, what is this, an innocent is coming up the stairs, I let her past then discover Zombie Locky has vanished... most mysterious... I withdraw to look...
Zombie Locky reports:
Carrie above, JJ below. Wow! A proper ambush. But when are the people going to arrive on the first floor behind me? So I try manuoevring round to get a lucky shot away at them.
After a bit of a standoff Carrie dropped her gun over the balcony and fired, but I ducked back just in time. As she moved back I came forward and fired up at her, just missing.
Zombie Locky reports:
And I took a pot shot at JJ, which just missed his weapon-carrying arm. Soon afterwards I retreated into my alcove and decided to leave before someone trapped me against the doors. An innocent conveniently turned up at that point, and as Carrie and I stopped messing around to let her through, I took advantage of the confusion to beat a hasty retreat.
Mrs. Fluffy Ex-Umpire reports:
I suspected Locky of running off to come up behind me so I legged it back along the corridor (being on the floor above him). I turned the corner... saw a figure... shot... then my brain switched on and I realised I had just taken off The Prinny Squad's arm... bollocks!
The Prinny Squad reports:
I backed off and unpacked the super-laser-targetting-acid-splash-cannon-of-destruction, then spent a while covering the three exits into the central staircase with the almighty-invisible-flying-kingsman-Xanth, hoping that our other remaining ally hadn't fallen to the Highlander's boundless rage at being set-up.
Dood! he knew it was a trap!
Anyway... The Super-fluffy-bouncy-hippy-Carrie. Headed off along the upper corridor to see what was happening, We waited another few minutes, and, fearing for our super-friends, the aforementionned-amazing-all-purpose-cannonbearer-Xanth headed along the lowest level to find out what happened.
Sounds like a horror movie dood...
Yeah, getting picked off one by one didn't suit me, so I decided to head along the top corridor at the same time, so that we'd appear at the same time and confuse him. However, halfway along the corridor I ran into the equally-aforementionned-and-equally-amazing-Carrie, who reacting rather fast, shot me in the arm.
Dood! wrong team!
Zombie Locky reports:
It seems my little confusion-causing ruse worked! At least, Carrie didn't see me leave and so looked back past the innocent to see an empty space where before there had been large begingered kamikaze madman with weaponry... who was now somewhere else in Newnham >:-)
Magical (Magical) Nurse Komugi-chan reports:
I was initially lurking at the bottom with JJ, then I went to check the other staircase with Carrie and Dave. After waiting a little there, I went back to JJ, where I was told that Locky was still in his alcove. I quickly headed back to the other staircase so that I could head him off with Dave. On getting to the staircase I saw neither Carrie nor Dave, but did spot Locky. The only thing that I could think of was that something had gone horribly wrong and that he'd somehow got both Carrie and Dave, but was confused enough by how bizarre the situation was that his first shot wasn't too far off.
Figuring that a number of my allies may have been dead, and knowing that Locky can run a lot faster than I can, I decided that I'd have to rely on knowing Newnham better than him. I darted down a corridor or two, then headed outside with the intent of ambushing him at some point in Peile, where I was told (by phone) that it had been resolved in the meantime.
Zombie Locky reports:
I was actually hoping to cut my losses and leave with the trophy of killing an ex-umpire and making out of an ambush alive. But when I got to the staircase, my instincts told me to go not down, but up where I had the vantage point. Memory on what exactly happened next is not very clear, but I remember turning to see a wandering and then suddenly terrified Xanth on the steps up from the floor below. Goodness me! They really are pulling out all the stops for me now. I'm not sure I deserve such attention! I took a shot with my Storm and he suddenly decided that running might be a good idea. Though I didn't really want to follow him into yet another ambush.
Mrs. Fluffy Ex-Umpire reports:
Having taken of Dave's arm we decided to swap weapons as his was a large two-handed watergun and hence no longer any use. I walked along the corridor after having seen Zombie Locky retreat that way and was rewarded at the top of the stairs by seeing him and Dave waving at each other through a glass fronted door. I took aim but he saw me and legged it... go on Dave...!!!!!!
The Prinny Squad reports:
Having swapped weapons with the I-can't-be-bothered-with-theese-silly-adjectives-anymore-Carrie, we turned around to see Locky approaching. I ducked away, dropped down a floor and ran along it as fast as I could, hoping to get around the back of Locky as he stood off with Carrie again, but as I reached the glass doors at the end of the middle floor corridor, Locky reached them from the other side, and we stood off grinning inanely at each other.
Oh no dood! if you move away, he'll shoot you!
Fortunately, Carrie poked the big water cannon over the balcony, and, having one shot narrowly miss his head, Locky turned and started running.
Zombie Locky reports:
I got to the top flight and saw Mrs. Fluffy Ex-Umpire coming towards me from the other side of the doors with an XP which she had mysteriously acquired from somewhere. I decided that she was likely to outrange my partially discharged Storm (which has a surprising range for its size but has a tiny reservoir) and so I turned to get out.
I got to the next floor down and bumped into Ahdok on the other side of the doors, with a Storm of his own. I jammed my foot against the doors so that neither of us could make any progress. And it was at about that time that I forgot about Carrie Oliver. Dave and I exchanged banter, until
Dave: "Whoever opens the door, it'll be a double kill."
*Carrie takes aim with the XP across the stairwell
Locky: "Aaagh no it won't!!"
*Locky runs away
The Prinny Squad reports:
With Locky's back to me he provided me with an easy target. Afterwards we sat around and chatted, and managed to convince Tom Booth to come and see if he could do any better.
Zombie Locky reports:
I ran towards the "down" stairs and leapt the first lot. Then I heard the squirt of a water pistol and The Prinny Squad shouting "Yes!" Then he got me on the back of the head and I conceded defeat at last.
Excellent fun though :-)
Leader of the People's Democratic Kakistocracy reports:
A brief report on Christ's Mayball.
I arrived at the back of the queue, Abf was but two metres behind me so because I really just wanted to have a nice evening I agreed a truce there and then. Later on I found Corkscrew to do similar with, but the moment of the evening was finally killing Michael Mann in person after someone handily pointed him out to me. I tried to find him four hours later too, but he had vanished.
Headlines | UpdatesProduced at Thu Jun 24 18:53:57 2004