Mew Two reports:
Foolish, foolish boys... Trust No-One.
Mew Two reports:
He claims he was mislead by some shady dealings amongst our group. This may be true, it may not. The facts as I see them: Kaiser Sophie (Bill S. Preston Esquire Monkey) held the knife. Looked at Camikaze. Camikaze nodded. I was stabbed.
Traiterous bastards. My revenge was swift. Kaiser Sophie, worryingly, seems to remain alive at the end of each of these bloodbaths... soon she will be disposed of.
Bwah ha. Sorry friends, it was for the honour of all my Pokemon brethren.
M2
The Highlander reports:
I had done a tour of the whole of Cambridge after watching the Matrix Reloaded again, and decided to sweep the wes' side of Newnham-Selwyn-Robinson-Wolfie. After talking to a friend outside Wolfson Court for a while I headed back via Grange Road.
Choices. Causality. Cause and effect. Action and reaction.
Robinson. J Doe acted. I reacted. He drew his CPS 2K. I said "Oh F***KING HELL!!" and cycled faster than ever in my life. I saw the spray head towards me but it fell short - a quick feel of my back and it was still dry. Gandalf the Grey claimed he hit me. Considering Dead J Doe's reputation with supersoakers and being killed I found this a bit hypocritical. I shouted a denial, and then...
Gandalf the Grey reports:
Thought I might have got your calf as you were cycling away. Thanks for checking this not to be so before phoning people.
Greased Lightning reports:
The Gunboat Diplomat charged from behind a bush wielding an XP. By this time I was going pretty fast and he was out of range. I headed to the Sidgwick Site and phoned Mike Cripps to let him know where the Caius Mafia were in case anyone felt like a counter-attack.
Although Binford lost out pretty heavily, I must congratulate them on the brave stand. Looks like they managed to break up whatever trap they were laying. Next time ask me and I'll join in.
Tenacious Girl reports:
He ran round Wolfson for a while trying to kill me. Then we went to bed, and he left.
The Rogue Godchild reports:
For "a while" substitute "two hours" :)
I never came close to killing her however due to the not leaving her room thing. She had convinced Mike Cripps to come and fight me off and I played hide and seek with him for a while. She did send out Bjoern once towards the end but he approached me with a shield and heavier weaponry. I ran off to get my own medium water but on returning found that he'd retreated back to the room.
It was an enjoyable if slightly frustrating way to spend the time I was locked out of Tithall for.
Tenacious Girl reports:
Mike was ever so nice, coming to my aid like that, though he did run off just as Bjoern went out to chase Banichi into him.
Then Banichi hung around knocking periodically and disturbing my neighbours.
Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! reports:
Information passed on via the Scottish intelligence network of Lachlan and Mike indicated that the Caius Mafia had just been sighted near Robinson. I rendezvoused with the Shadowing Lemma at the end of West Road and we crept northwards.
As we were approaching Robinson, a pair of CPS-wielding figures suddenly leapt from the bushes, lunged across the road at Matt and chased him away towards the UL. I pursued cautiously and watched them looking for him from the rather meagre cover of a fence, before Bryony turned back and saw me and I decided it would be a better idea to run away.
I took off down Herschel Road, then cunningly doubled around and hid behind some trees in the garden-like area near the entrance to Robinson. I watched Bryony and Nokes move a little way up the street, presumably looking for me, before turning back.
At this point everything went quiet for a bit. Some people went up the ramp I was hiding next to into the college talking about random lunatics with supersoakers. The next part I'm not entirely sure about because of the poor light, but it seems as though Claire and J Doe wandered rather unconcernedly into the gardens, possibly disguised with cycle helmets. We stared at one another around a tree for a while before I decided that there was absolutely no way they could have failed to see me, I was almost certainly outgunned and the best idea was probably to run away.
Presumably, not being burdened with a CPS, I could have outdistanced them and just fled the area, but I decided I may as well put up a fight. Unfortunately, it was only once I'd rounded a convenient corner and turned to shoot at the pursuing Bryony and Nokes that I realised it was too dark for me to tell where the pellets were going and I had no idea whether I was hitting either of them or not. Unfortunately by this point they had moved round to cut off my escape and so I carried on firing at them in the hope of hearing one of them go "ow" until they got close enough to shoot me.
Crazed Baron Haha reports:
I jumped a suspicious figure outside Robinson, who started running towards west rd., and then stopped. Fearing an ambush, being underarmed, I retreated. ;'-(
If this wasn't Matt, please tell the umpire!
It's MaTT! reports:
Walked up Grange Road towards Robinson until I spotted two supersoaker wielding people (probably Bryony and Ed) and turned down a side road in the hope of sneaking up on them. This plan thwarted when Crazed Baron Haha leapt out of the bushes so rapidly increasing the distance between us (legged it), I tried to lure her down the road away from backup.
Crazed Baron Haha: underarmed? Did you see my weapons? :)
Choleopteron Astralis reports:
as good a place as any to give a general account...
We wanted to assault any players leaving Christian Games AND lure BJ out. As it happens we got to see Locky, and later Owain? (out of range) I think.
Bryony did not like the Shrubbery. It was indeed a Vile Shrubbery cos we hid in it, then Adam hid in it, then we pushed him out of it and hid in it again loads more and left a rearguard in it who foiled Matt Laycock. Adam got in whilst we put units in the Clare Hall West ambush point lest BJ went that way but we abandoned this when Matt Johnson was sighted in his natural environment -behind a letterbox-. Because we knew he was there we had to deal quickly with Adam which meant two hemmed him into the street next to the Rugby ground whilst two checked that the Clare Hall Main sidegates were all locked so he couldn't loop round on less than a 6 minute timescale. We then charged at Johnson, splitting out units in front of the UL so that Nokes would take them from behind. But Johnson also had two nasty surprises with him which made an excellent combination: Mr No-Water-Zone and Mr I-ve-also-got-a-2K. This made for a very good punch-up !!!
Gandalf the Grey reports:
Cripps made things awkward, and Matt covered well for Jeff, and flanked me whilst I shot Jeff, and Jeff shot my legs 2k to 2k. Mat shot from the side took off both my head and Bryony's arm whilst Bryony's covering fire took him out. Bryony's missing arm proved to be important later.
Shadowing Lemma reports:
On hearing that a 'few' assassins might be near robinson, The Shadowing Lemma rushed in to see what was happenning - Maybe, the Lemma thought, one of them would be a Mathematician. Joy! Not one Mathematician, but several! and all armed with CPS! and Umbrellas! Wheeee!.. ahem. erm run. run quickly.
Some time later, still only armed with my trusty brace of pistols, and with backup on the way, I creapt forward in cover. Quick! Freeze! Not ten meters from the megre bush the Lemma was shadowing from did 2 of the Mathemeticians pass! Alas, but it was not yet time. My pistols didn't have the range, and wouldn't reach. Fortunately, I was side on, impossible to spot, for the Lemma is a 2D creature, and can only be seen straight on.
Aha! Re-inforcements! Two others arrive - we start to hatch the most cunning of plans, when the Mathemeticians pre-empt us! Who would have thought it! We spread out, and its 3 on two, when one of their number appear from behind! We were almost undone - but he didn't expect our heavy artilliary. He was almost got - but alas, escaped by mere inches. More fire was exchanged, and the Lemma became more frantic, with blood-lust - the Mathematicians were so close! One of them took out a colleague, but was wounded in the proccess - the Lemma saw its chance! It leaped on the fallen enemy, and killed it in one sweep! Alas - the other was only wounded by the Lemma's Pounce, and another Mathematician managed to avenge the one the Lemma had killed.....
Honorable Girtonian reports:
Apparently my DOS was watching some of this.
The crippled product of Jenny's sadistic tendencies reports:
I ran around a lot again. And then some more. And eventually I got cornered between the Nokesian and ++?????++ Out of Cheese Error. I made a desperate charge for freedom past ++?????++ Out of Cheese Error but she rubber-band-gunned me to death as I sprinted past.
However it transpired she had lost an arm in the earlier events and so shouldn't have been firing at me. So we duelled it out with a pellet-gun apiece.
My first shot vanished into the night, hers hit me dead centre.
4 more hours then...Vengeance will be mine, Caian nation. Just as soon as I find myself some more nerf pellets that is...
Origami Chopsticks reports:
Oops! Damn those pesky tingling fingers.. Anyway, after much not shooting of Mike he went down to my last but one rubber band. Fired from my non-existant hand. Or possibly that was the hand holding the umberella, I can't remember, suffice to say there was a limb in operation that was somewhat illegal. So we dueled beneath the streetlights, my bullet flew straight and I made my first ever kill with a pellet gun. Wooo!
The Lady of Shallotts reports:
I think Owain made an attempt on us last night. Though I spared him at the time due to state of undress, I killed him with onions this morning just for being so unsubtle.
Ser Davos Seaworth reports:
The world's most advanced multipurpose EDITH (Eat, Detonate, Impale, Throw or Hide) weaponsystem was deployed in order to deal with the disposable blade of death's hitech defense. Faced with such a superior missile heading his way he had just the split of a second to react, but didn't quite manage to dodge it.
The Highlander reports:
*Knock knock*
*Yawn* "Be there in a sec!"
*Get RBG and look through spyhole - no-one there*
"Who is it?"
"It's John."
This didn't sound much like John Haigh so I peeped out of the door. No-one there. But the fire door was ajar. Then I saw Banichi's grinning face as a rubber band flew past. "Hi Banichi!" *Shut door*
"Did you shoot him?" "Shut up!"
Hmmmmmmmmm. I radioed a warning to the rest of Girton, and armed myself. Then I got dressed and left...
JabbaWookie's and other alien hybrids reports:
Arrived at his room, he left, I shot him. (At least he said it was he afterwards)
PS I HAVE A POSSIBLE INP KILL FROM YESTERDAY TO REPORT. IN MY PARANOIA I SHOT AT Z.G from my vantage point and anoyingly that time I hit her. However I didn't think to ask where so maybe I will be lucky(but doubt it). It will be entered (but probably with made up time-good for anyone killing me before it is clarified)
The Rogue Godchild reports:
On my daily morning stroll past Tom Cuckston's door, I saw Gentiana verna approaching down the long corridor. Instantly I began foaming at the mouth and twisting my neck till it cracked. Another of Jenny's hated godchildren!! I charged at her rabidly and gunned her down, firing off my entire clip into her writhing body. That's one less reminder of my tortured childhood to run into.
The Rogue Godchild reports:
With the bloodlust upon me I felt compelled to hunt for more of my hated half-siblings. I rushed to the abode of the disposable blade of death where I found both the door and window open. Spread out across his bed were the remains of his body, which bore the tell-tale signs of mutilation by our mutual parent. Sickened and furious I turned away, how dare she kill her own children, that's my task.
The Rogue Godchild reports:
As I frustratedly left the scene I ran into The Highlander. He was waiting just outside the door and as I came through turned and banged me with his rpg. Simultaneously I ducked and shot him in the chest with my dual rbgs. Since it was more or less a double kill and it wasn't clear whether he'd actually been pointing the gun at me due to my leet ducking skills we agreed to have an indoor duel through the corridors of Girton. I was given two minutes to get away which I spent most productively relieving my bladder nearby. The instant that the time was up The Highlander rushed up the staircase nearby at the top of which I was coincidentaly lurking. I shot him in the top of the head as he mounted the final flight of stairs.
The Highlander reports:
Arse and buggery. I really need to practice this kind of stuff. But preferably without being killed.
I went to my dead Godbrother's room and assimilated his rifle to my collection of weaponry. Then I prowled around Girton grounds for a bit in case the assassins in question had headed off. Returning to the front entrance, I had a peek down the corridor I suspected they would use and duly saw The Rogue Godchild and [assassin's identity withheld in case of necromancy]. I hid behind a pillar and waited for their emergence.
"BANG BANG!!!"
They fired at me at the same time. We agreed on a potentially convoluted duel, whereby I would duel The Rogue Godchild first, and if I survived I would then duel the other. Banichi chose the corridors of Girton on the south side, and had 2 minutes to find a hiding place. I headed up the first staircase and tried to get to the top floor as it had lots of nice little alcoves to hide in. Unfortunately I forgot that The Rogue Godchild has been scoping Girton for many months now and knew this also. I saw the first shot and ducked, but the second hit me on the top of my head.
Arse and buggery.
Damn Hoovers reports:
There was something lurking suspiciously outside my room, so I pulled a gun on it. Because it turned out to be a hoover and not an assassin, I didn't kill it.
Curse my bedder!
The Dusk Treader reports:
Wandering into my kitchen, in a dressing gown, at a sensible breakfast time, I heard a yell of 'There he is!' and saw movement.
I dodged.
I then popped into my room, and retrieved a sword.
My assailant was hiding behind the door - swords work better around door than guns do.
That makes three instances of death by the sword.
Gill the Grocer reports:
Open door might mean BJ trap?
Enter the Onion
*Crazed martial arts sequence with umbrella and root vegetables, only to find Lois unarmed and sitting at her desk*
Blood Animal reports:
I was eating my lunch when a woman walked into the dining hall. the years of therapy and psycho analysis failed and i returned to my usual state...
"Woman, Woman, Woman, Woman, woman, mmmm, dead Woman."
Laura Bambury RIP
Blood Animal reports:
I couldn't let any witnesses live could I?
"Man, Man, Man, Man, mmmm, dead Man."
Tom Kerswill RIP
Blood Animal reports:
"Another man, another man, another man, another man!"
Richard Fallon RIP
Blood Animal reports:
"Woman, Woman, Woman, Woman, mmmmm, dead woman"
Guru Sankar RIP
"hey, he's not a woman..."
Honorable Girtonian reports:
But Guru does seem to enjoy being shot.
Mew Two reports:
Jokers.
Once again, those f**king Caians wait until I've just had four hours sleep after a ball, then get me out of bed in order to answer the door and be shot through the letterbox (this is now sellotaped up, and housemates have been briefed). At least this time we had a proper chat (me from the beyond), though it strikes me that I should have asked them how they got the combination code to the front door.... a little bit worrying. I sent them on their way with descriptions of my nearby player "friends"... bwah ha.
They actually returned five hours later, not sure how long they were sitting staring through my letterbox before I happened to come downstairs but they clearly all need hobbies. "Can we have a duel?" "There are five of you and you all have about sixteen guns on your person... uh, no thanks."
I remain alive, though trapped in a room about two foot square... and with five housemates frightened to death by the whole experience despite being non-players. My faith in human nature is gone.
M2
Gandalf the Grey reports:
two men were besieging Catherine Hall's room... as one does ... they were taken down with labelled root vegetables of isotropic mass tensor.
Gandalf the Grey reports:
they had low power bb's/bandguns and were assaulted from behind.
Ser Davos Seaworth reports:
Was looking for juicy targets in the Caius-Newnham area (I really thought the Caius mafia was going to turn up, but they were probably too busy planning their amazing raid on Girton). Found nobody, so I gave up and walked back through Harvey Court (well, one can always hope to be lucky). There was a group of people organising some sort of party and suddenly one of them (looking a lot like Chris Field) shouted:"That guy over there has a gun in his bag!"
Then he picked up a XP-310 and came towards me. Ooops, need to work on concealing my guns or maybe one just can't hide anything bigger than a 2k. I drew and he shouted:"Arg, he's got a BIG gun!" and ran away. He then reappeared twice and the second time he sprinted away into the building screaming:"Arg, you are Björn!"
Oh, well, in my days Caians didn't use to run away, but these young people nowadays, they just cannot fight without a group of at least 4.
The Lady of Shallotts reports:
I could have told Chris that Bjoern has a very big gun.
TROGDOR the BURNiNATOR reports:
Well, at least I recognised him. I really should have thought it through more carefully and approached curiously only to stab him. It was nice of him to throw garlic at me and miss, saves me having to go to sainsburys for an asu. Essentially I was busy with the whole CUES thing and John-Mark distraction earlier had left me happy to just get rid of assassins rather than kill them.
The One-Armed Bandit reports:
I was on a dangerous mission deep into enemy territory. I was trying to liberate sandwiches so I could feed. Who's this I see? Inigo Montoya no less. Quickly I hide behind the Post van that's just drawn up. I pull my RPG and charge! Dopey fool. I have to shout BANG! twice before he realises...
Oh, and a note to the Caians, I found my NERF Pellets. Heheheh.
Trinity Hall Second Years 3
Trinity Hall (+Clare) First Years 0
Not a bad day so far...
Shadowing Lemma reports:
Here was I, lazily sitting my room when I hear a shouted "No Water!!" from The crippled product of Jenny's sadistic tendencies. Hmm - I wonder if there could be assassins out there? <quick CPS fill> - look out the window - aha! Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! I go the other way, and leave via a window.
Slipping round the side of the house, what should I find - but Banichi as well. 15 minutes of stalking, being seen, futile exchanges of fire, and more circling to another location later - to repeat again (all the while with them firing at Determinator in the building I find that Banichi has gone inside, with the only door covered by a CPS-wielding Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!!
You know, if theres one lesson Banichi should take away with him from this, its that you should never leave a window open behind you, *even* if theres an 8 foot drop out of it.......
Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! reports:
I was accompanying Banichi, who was on the way back from Girton, into Wychfield, when we spotted the Scotsman wandering merrily out of his house. He saw our CPS and XP310s and waved his immunity-granting cast at us, whereupon we drew pellet pistols and charged him and he ran away.
Banichi went into the house to attack Determinator, who had appeared at an upstairs window, while I stayed outside to fend of the attacks of a Shadowing Lemma which kept creeping up from various directions with a CPS in one hand and an XP in the other. A long and convoluted battle sequence resulted in which Banichi kept running in and out of the building as I described to him the movements of Determinator between the windows above, while dodging Determinator's sniper fire and driving off the Shadowing Lemma as it approached from one direction after another with CPS blazing.
At one point we almost prevailed when Banichi climbed into the building through a civilian's window, but Determinator saw through his ruse and failed to be ambushed as required. Eventually we reached a sort of equilibrium state with Banichi and Determinator sniping at one another from the windows of the house, which was unfortunately broken when the Shadowing Lemma, which had snuck around the back of the house, leapt in through a first-floor window and tore Banichi limb from limb.
Shadowing Lemma reports:
With Banichi down, there was only Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! left alive. I shouted to Determinator that this was the case, while covering Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! from the side. Determinator came out on the other side of Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!!, and we had him trapped - it was only a matter of time. I tried to go round and attach from another angle, but Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! was still out of reach. After more fire was exchanged, Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! lost a leg - it was almost over. More shots, and valient hopping later and both Determinator and Shadowing Lemma closed, hitting from either side, but Determinator got there slightly sooner
Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! reports:
Almost no sooner had I heard the commotion in the upstairs corridor of the house than the Shadowing Lemma had emerged to gloat over its dismemberment of my comrade. Since I was preoccupied with fending it off I was unable to prevent Determinator from exiting the house and moving across into the bushes behind me. The Lemma fired at me with a CPS, taking off my leg, before I chased it back around the house and started sniping at Determinator who had fallen back to just out of CPS range, until my gun made an unpleasant clicking noise and stopped firing.
I hopped across the lawn towards the house (no longer fearing snipers in the window since Determinator was outside), pulled the clip from the gun and grabbed a couple of pellets from the grass. Determinator rather astutely pointed out that my gun was out of ammunition and ran from cover towards me, whereupon I remembered myself, threw the empty gun away, took another from my pocket and very nearly shot him as he changed course to take cover behind a building.
At this point the Lemma appeared again with its CPS while Determinator snuck off behind a small building. I took some potshots at the Lemma with my remaining pellet gun, all of which flew past it, then retreated and performed a mighty hop onto a raised section of wall. I continued to brandish my RPG at the Lemma while covering the corner Determinator was behind with a rubber band gun, but a simultaneous charge from both of them with guns blazing was too much for me to avoid.
The I Didn't Do It Boy reports:
I didn't do it.
Ways reports:
Bumped into Hellacious Carbuncle outside King's and shot him.
The Squirrel reports:
Casually walking out of my door, I bumped into the rather unfortunate Gentiana verna knocking her unconscious with my infamous hammer and shooting her through the chest.
The Minister of Halt's Hour reports:
Walked out of Master's tea Party, saw something Holden Caulfield shaped entering the porter's lodge on the other side of Old Court. Legged it round. (No going on the grass of course) Got to p'lodge. Holden Caulfield shaped thing was indeed Holden Caulfield BANG
Amish Pole Man reports:
I didn't even enjoy it. Far too easy.
Blood Animal reports:
The Blood Knight has made me honorable and taught me how to control my anger and channell it to good use. he says it was honorable of me to kill Simon while he was defenceless. also it was made more honorable because it was simons gun that i used to kill him. The Blood Knight is teaching me the ways of Death, Honor and Glory.
"Woman, woman, woman, woman..."
Blood Animal reports:
I've had enough so i killed myself. it was an honorable death, i shot myself in the back.
Blood Animal
The Umpire reports:
For excessive muppetry and killing of innocents I have made John Hiagh of Girton WANTED. He will be worth 20 points to the next person to CPS him!
I would like to remind people that while killing innocents is fun, it is likley to bring the game into disrepute, and as such killing of illegal innocnets should be avoided as far as possible.
Honorable Girtonian reports:
I believe most of the innocents killed in Girton were in fact Guru, who appeared to be loving it.
Blood Animal reports:
You honour me with your sentiments. haveing a price on my head is most honourable. may the people who want the reward also be honourable although i doubt that they will be.
May the Blood be with you.
the disposable blade of death reports:
... I came upon the highlander relaxing in the Jcr and shot him, he replied he had been hit only on the arm, and we shot one another simultaneously. Thus we had a duel. Eventually i killed him. Hooray. I'm going to As you like it tonight,in Christs, it's great! ...
Joe Devils and Jeff Watson versus the Totally Insane Killer Rubber Band Gun of Dhoooooom!!! reports:
Wandering unparanoidly out of Sainsburys in a state of death, Bryony Baines appeared out of nowhere and emptied an XP into my torso in a businesslike manner. I explained that I was already dead and she went away again.
The Minister of Halt's Hour reports:
I was wandering into town with Abi, and as we passed Sainsbury's, I saw a suspicious figure who looked like J Doe. While I was deciding, Abi screamed "Snapdragon!" so I legged it down Green Street, but quickly turned and fired at the pursuing J Doe. He used his shield to block, but fell over. I got his legs, and I believe his chest, but he denied it, and there was no evidence on his dark jacket. So we duelled, and he won comfortably.
I was doing rather well this time yesterday as well.....Oh well, nicely done.
Bjryöny Osbjörn reports:
Enter Felix, preceded by his K...
We'd have probably killed each other in some combination if the cyclists themselves hadn't called a ceasefire...
Jeff was then cornered in the Thompsons Lane area alleyways which some of us unfortunately knew from the Bishop Bateman/Magdalene Mafia days.
Mew Two reports:
Kaiser Sophie has been eliminated. The world is a safer place.
For four hours.
M2
Amish Pole Man reports:
She got my left arm with an RPG.
The Squirrel reports:
After eating my tea peacefully, I hid in a minor corridor behind a portable bar waiting eagerly for the Amish Pole Man. He arrived, I thought I had a victory and had shot him, we were talking about it and then he said it hit him in the arm.... obviously much lighter than me as he wasn't carrying a weapon, he ran like lightening (he really really wasn't just a faster runner, honest)and got away.... ah well, c'est la vie.
TROGDOR the BURNiNATOR reports:
Well it was the CUES (eng soc) garden party today and as a responsible committee member I helped to set up. At about midday we were plagued by John-Mark with a gun and umbrella in the bushes, eventually scared off by large calibre water weapons. Then merely half an hour later who turns up (looking very inconspicuous handling a bag with what appeared to be a large tube in it) but Bjoern (I reckon it was him anyway). After scaring (yes, that is how I see it :p) him off with similar weapons to his own and general access to better positions within HC the garden party proceeded. Much fun, much soaking with champagne... And then 7pm as we clear up, John-Mark returns, eating his dinner and whoops, getting shot!
Evolution reports:
It was a bit stupid really. I would have got away if the F****** gate had not been shut. My brave heroic (ineffective) method of fighting as tested on Adam Bitcliffe, Edd Alcott (found to be successful at 500m) and Chris this morning failed. By the way F****** is Finella in case you were wondering.
Edd Alcott reports:
I have to say your strategy when attacking me that morning was one I hadn't seen before, though I found it quite amusing. Legging it as fast as possible in the opposite direction is a proud tradition followed by such notables as Brave Sir Robin. You may be a bit disappointed to learn that I was armed only with a single rubber band gun for most of that day........
JabbaWookie's and other alien hybrids reports:
So was I, but today I have brought the only key essential assassins equipment. (Abiet it's not full length)
The Kinky Pizza Delivery Girl from Hell reports:
Bjoern knocked, I shot.
She called me a bitch, which is no more than truth, and I wished her a happy mayball. ;)
Gandalf the Grey reports:
he was ready I was ready
his went into my nose off my umbrella mine went into his stomach (double kill)
freeze time and try again in the corridor.
he hit my leg and my chest whereas i hit an unidentified body part so it was his.
so he'd survived a fraction of a second longer to meet Bryony's bullet.
The Ghost of Lachlan McLean reports:
I heard that assassins abounded in Girton, so picked up the CPS I had used in the ill-fated duel against Owain earlier and decided to haunt them. I wandered the corridors, moaning "WooooooOOooooooOOOOOOooooooh!!!" when I finally found them, about to have a duel between Slobbering Wolf and Gandalf the Grey. Ed Nokes and I umpired, and it was agreed that Tom Cuckston had shot Ed in the chest, despite some doubt due to the poor light.
Peter McGowan and John Haigh turned up with a water pistol and an XP respectively, and were squirted for their troubles. They were also already dead.
Then Cathy Hall (the Girton one) approached from behind a crowd, nabbed an RBG lying on the floor and shot Ed Nokes from behind Tom Cuckston. There was some argument about this but Ed conceded that he had missed with his first shot, and so had died.
Then Cathy ran away before backup returned in the form of three assassins. Claire Bordenave ran after her but jumped back in a hail of rubber bands. Then she and the others pursued her. Seems that Cathy got Claire but died to Bryony. Sarah Reynolds popped up, having seen the crowd of assassins earlier, and shot Bryony. But Sarah was dead. Shame.
Meanwhile the Blood Animal and Knight and I took Ed Nokes outside and we all hosed each other with CPSs to the cries of "Blood Honour Death Bravery", while J Doe went off to see what happened. After a while the remaining live assassins retreated and the Girtonians all soaked Eds Nokes and J Doe, Claire and Bryony. Bryony got me with an onion and then ran away with my CPS, while John picked up the onion and mortar-bombed Peter.
What fun! Next time you'll end up in the duck pond ;-)
Blood Animal reports:
though from beyond the grave i fought with honour and braver with blood on my mind. i shot as many people in the back as they were walking away as possible. my master said that i was doing well so i shot him too. the whold thing was one glorious bloodbath, as more and more arrived from beyond the grave we got more and more covered in our own blood.
Gentiana verna reports:
WOW WHAT A SHOT!! Caught unawares, lured by a friend!
The Godmother reports:
WOO-HOO!
Fool Girl reports:
Our cunning plan to kill the victim (hiding in their room as we rampaged outside, despite our best attempts to be unthreatening..) failed. Possibly because TOM HOUNSHAM was sitting in the corridor behind us listening and phoning carrie. DAMNIT. Why did we not SHOOT HIM. Grrr.
This is somewhat embarrassing as I did in fact shoot him the day before...
The Squirrel reports:
Actually...... you failed to notice the spyhole in my door! - Was I really gonna come out with around 5 people armed with a couple of umberellas when all I had was an RPG?! - I thought it best to sit inside my room and read a good book for the duration!
Also, I allerted Tom Hounsham to the fact you were there rather than the other way round and he went to Pete's room after seeing you all, he thought he'd better ask Pete for a blank disk to carry back just to look like he'd gone there for a different reason!
- who was the guy stood outside my door for a while without knocking, he looked rather bored stood there swinging his umbrella around?
I liked the hats and disguises and even if the rubber bands had hit me that were fired under the door, which they didn't as I was stood on a chair, they could only have injured me!
Good fun anyway, I was contemplating abseiling out of my window!!
Robert d'Artois reports:
I couldn't do anything when Gentiana Verna charged at me with a bottle of acid, being encumbered by my parasol (some people might appreciate this ;) )... As a result i suffered a most horrible death.
Je suis sûr que c'est un coup fourré de ma tante Mahaut : la gueuse ! Que la lèpre lui mange la face !!!!!
Fortunately i was avenged in the following half second by my Dame de Parage Brionne de l'Erreur du Manque de Fromage.
Amish Pole Man reports:
During all the Girton-based-madness I had been strolling around looking like an innocent. I then went and hid in my kitchen until I heard somone go passed. I leapt out and shot Bryony in the back of the head with a water pistol, who claimed to be already dead. BUT, she had been 'killed' by Sarah, who was still dead from my earlier kill.
Therefore I appear to have killed Bryony Baines.
Mwahhahahahahah. (Cough)
The Umpire reports:
Alas for due to the muppetry involving a certain player who had "killed" Bryony before resurrecting herself, Bryony is not dead, however Tom gets 25 points anyway in way of compensation.
Nap So Grand reports:
Well, it was nice to see the much vaunted Caius Mafia wiped out by a load of basically unarmed girls. Well done to Girton for killing them all.
I maintain that I was to only memeber of that ill fated trip to survive, even though Bryony got off on a technicality.
I do feel that it was rather bad form for them to ambush me on my way home from punting, but had I not been quite so drunk I would have got away (I had major problems finding my card to get in)
Oh well, better luck next time, hope they try for me on the way to the garden party, as this time I won't be drunk, and hence able to shoot straight.
Tenacious Girl reports:
If I say anything, I'll be moaned at by Pufferfish.
Ways reports:
My so called "friends" had told me that Joy wouldn't be coming to watch video with us, so I figured that it would be safe to sit with my back to the door. When she did turn up I had my hands full of pizza and didn't stand a chance.
The Dusk Treader reports:
Plans change, as I understand it. Not that I'd know, of course. Oh no. Not me...
Inigo Montoya reports:
And so began the tithall june event.. once 22:10 had passed, i respawned and soon spotted Determinator lurking in the bushes. i observed as he snuk down behind the pizza stall, and then ran down the middle of the latham lawn to meet him as he emerged from the back of the fajita van. bang.
Inigo Montoya reports:
Looking for an Arrogant Nappy Telescope, I headed towards the dance tent, when someone said "bang" behind me. By reflex, i withdrew my RPG and returned the "bang".. i thought it was all over. Then Oscar the Grouch asked me if pointing two fingers counted as a gun... Had Oscar the Grouch used a valid weapon, I would have been quite dead. Next..
Inigo Montoya reports:
With help from a non-player, i finally located Arrogant Nappy Telescope. I casually walked up to my victim, pointed my rpg at his back and "bang". he doesnt react. remembering rule 1.2.4, I repeated, and he acnowledged the kill..
So i was the only live assassin in the june event as far as i knew... time to relax for a bit, and down a few more cans of red bull.. (-:
Headlines | UpdatesProduced at Fri Jul 4 13:40:59 2003